I ran into the one from my past.
The one that broke me open, left me unsure I'd ever find another lover.
The one I moved cities for and left cities to escape.
I hurt for a long time after we parted
He was my first true lust
The kind of love you develop in the most non challant of ways
A drunk haze
The youth of our folly
But dear god you made it holy
The "I'm not looking for love but this is a divine time and we cannot predict the way hearts align"
So I gave in and he got under my skin
But sometimes good things have to end.
••• "I'll see you around."
••• "Absolutely" I smiled back knowing we'll never see each other again.
He was in my hood'.
And I was talking to him the way I talk to customers at work.
••• "I saw your brother last week"
•••"He mentioned that."
Even after three years, the air is thick with words unsaid and threads in my head.
I was going to go to the hardware store, but I decided to be on time.
I didn't know i had a date with fate.
Destiny is always fucking with me.
I must be pure entertainment for fate and his fickle friends.
Shit like this is always happening to me....or for me.
I'm taught the latter looms closer to the truth.
He held Thai food by his side and I wondered if his order is still the same.
Drunken noodles. To match his mind.
I never thought I would walk by this boy turned man and not want to cry.
I still love him but in a you were so good for my younger heart kind of appreciation.
You eventually stop missing someone you no longer know.
Even so, he may always have a piece of my heart in tow.....
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